Deception So Dark Read online

  But I was the one who had failed him.

  On shaking legs, I forced myself up and out of the shed, away from that little house with silver walls. I shuffled across the yard to the gravel driveway, where Tristan stood with his hands shoved into his pockets, head down, as Kellan lectured him. He wouldn’t lift his head to look at me.

  A black rental car sat next to Tristan’s blue one. Melanie sat in the back of the black car, huddling under a blanket. She wouldn’t look at me either.

  I needed to get Jillian’s ballet slipper and Logan’s sheet music back. They weren’t anywhere in the yard, so I pushed against the wind to Lady Elke’s house and slipped inside. Silent, shadowed, and empty. Kellan’s guards must have already headed back to the APR with her. I found the ballet shoe and sheet music on the kitchen floor. Above them, a drawer was open, and it was full of silver. Utensils, ladles, spatulas. And knives. Lots of knives. They glittered and glimmered, sparkled and glowed.

  I slammed the drawer shut.

  Then I tucked the ballet shoe and the sheet music into the pocket of Tristan’s hoodie and went back outside. Time to face Tristan.

  He was still standing at the car with Kellan. “She had a vision of the nightmare Tessa has every night, and then she made it come true,” he said as I approached. “Her eye turned black, just like in Tessa’s nightmare. She said Tessa was tarnished. Tainted. She wanted to make her pay for what her parents did.”

  I nodded. I couldn’t disagree. That was exactly what had happened. “What’s going to happen to her?” I asked Kellan.

  “That woman is obviously an extremely wise and gifted psychic,” he said, “but she tried to kill my niece. We can’t risk her losing control like that again. She’s headed for the Underground.”

  “Please don’t neutralize her,” I begged. “She can find my brother and sister. She was about to tell us where they were.”

  Kellan snorted. “All inmates are neutralized, Miss Carson. I can’t do anything about it.”

  Frustration and despair roared in my ears. Once again, I’d come so close to finding Jillian and Logan, and they’d slipped away. “That’s not fair,” I said. “Nothing you do is fair. Our lives were in jeopardy today, but you didn’t shoot to kill. You only tranquilized her. If you find my brother and sister, you don’t have to kill them. Tranquilize them if you have to, but don’t kill them. Please.”

  He stared at me, speechless. I stared back, knowing my point was valid. Hypocrite, I shouted at him silently.

  Then the cool hardness returned to his face. “I am not a hypocrite. I didn’t use deadly force on that woman because I had a clean shot from behind.” He walked around the car to the driver’s side. “Your brother and sister used their psychokinesis to fly Aaron Jacobs’ car off a cliff. They can kill with the power of their minds, just like your mother. They are far more dangerous than a crazy old psychic with a knife. Make no mistake—if I feel my life, my agents’ lives, or the lives of any innocent bystanders are in jeopardy, I will shoot to kill.”

  Now I was the one left speechless. And hopeless. Tristan just shook his head. “You’re right, Tessa,” he muttered, “but you’ll never change his mind.”

  Kellan slid into the car. “I’m flying Melanie home. You two are on your own. Take a different plane, drive back, don’t come back at all, I don’t care. I don’t want either of you anywhere near my niece.”

  He slammed the door shut and peeled off, leaving us alone under the darkening sky.

  Behind us, Lady Elke’s house stood empty. The shed sat off to the side, the door off its hinges, walls dented and sagging. As we watched, it moaned, creaked, and finally collapsed in on itself in a cacophony of screaming wood and clanging metal. The clatter echoed, and from far away, a dog howled.

  “The little house with silver walls is gone now,” I said. “Your mom’s dream happened. I survived.”

  “Barely,” Tristan mumbled. He kept his head down and leaned against the car.

  “Tristan, I’m sorry.” I pressed into his chest, but he didn’t put his arms around me. “I don’t mean to make you feel like a failure.”

  “I’m trying to keep you safe.” His gaze, cold as the wind that whipped at my cheeks, was fixed on a brown patch of dirt on the ground. “But I can’t. Even when my premonitions work and you don’t ignore them, I still can’t keep you safe.” He whirled around, kicking the car’s back tire. “Kellan had to save you today. Kellan.” He said his name like it tasted bad in his mouth.

  “I did a stupid, reckless, irresponsible thing today,” I said. “But it’s not your job to keep me safe.”

  He looked at me then, just a glimpse, then back to the dirt. He swallowed hard, then whispered, “You fell in love with me because I made you feel safe.”

  The pain in his voice and the wounded look on his face made something break inside me. Being a hero was how he defined himself, and I’d taken that from him.

  “I don’t love you because of your warning premonitions,” I said. “I love you because your eyes are so incredibly blue and because your hair turns gold in the sun. Because you have broad shoulders and strong arms and you let me wear your hoodies every day. And that’s only the little things. You’re kind, and smart, and supportive, and respectful. All you have to do to make me feel safe is put your arms around me. That’s why I love you, Tristan.”

  He said nothing. Just stood there, stiff, and stared at that patch of dirt.

  I’d hurt him so much that not even my expression of love could make it better.

  “You’re not failing me,” I said. “You could never fail me. But I failed you. I came into your life and I ruined it. You gave up so much for me. You lost Melanie because of me. You lost Nathan because of me. You almost lost your life, so many times, because of me. And my parents…” My heart pumped my tainted, tarnished blood through my veins. “I’m Killers’ Spawn, Tristan. I don’t deserve your love.”

  At that, he melted. The anger in his eyes, the tightness in his face, the tension in his shoulders.

  “Lady Elke saw your nightmare and called you Killers’ Spawn,” he murmured, taking a lock of my hair in his fingers. “She got that from you.”

  I nodded, and now I stared at the patch of dirt on the ground.

  “Tainted blood. Tarnished blood. She got all of that from you. Is that how you really feel? Is that why you think you don’t deserve my love?”

  Shame and despair crawled up into my throat and blocked my words, and I could only nod.

  Now, finally, finally, he put his arms around me, pulled me close. “You have wildflower eyes. Your hair is the color of honey. You slide your hands into your sleeves. You pick the green peppers from your salad. You wear my hoodies every day. And that’s only the little things. You stand up to Kellan and the Lab Brats. You’ll do anything to find your brother and sister. You’ve been through so much, but you get up every morning and you fight. You’re amazing, Tessa. You more than deserve my love. You are my heart. You are my soul.”

  “But my parents—”

  He kissed me. It tasted like love.

  “I don’t care about your parents,” he said. “I only care about us. You and me.”

  “Us. You and me,” I repeated, and for just a moment, my heart stopped pumping my killers’ blood through my veins, and instead it echoed in rhythm: Thump. Thump-th-thump.

  Even the Nightmare Eyes dimmed.

  We stayed like that, me pressed against his chest and breathing him in, and him holding me tight, until the sky turned dark and it was just the two of us, under the stars.

  “How dare you.”

  Those were the words Deirdre used to greet me when Tristan and I returned to the Connellys’ house as the sun rose the next morning. She stood in the foyer, hair a mess of copper, arms crossed, lips curved down.

  “I gave you one rule to follow, Tessa. One. Stay in Lilybrook,” she said. “And what did you do, the first chance you had? You left Lilybrook.”

  So this was it. I’d disregarded Deir
dre’s premonition. Disobeyed her orders. I’d left town, and in doing so, I almost got her son killed. Dennis and Tristan had already risked their lives for me, and now Tristan had to do it again. Tristan and I had finally reconciled, but Deirdre was going to tell me to leave, to get out and never come back, just like my mother had done.

  “How dare you make me worry like that?” She grabbed both Tristan and me in a hug so tight I could barely breathe. “I was frantic.”

  “I—” I mumbled into her chest. “You’re not kicking me out?”

  “Kick you out?” she said, still holding me tight. “Tessa, no. I’m upset that you deceived us, but I understand how desperate you are to find your siblings. But honey, you cannot leave Lilybrook again. We can’t risk my dream happening.”

  “Mom, it did happen,” Tristan chuckled. “Your dream came true.”

  “What? How? Are you okay? Are you hurt?” She released us, then put her hands on my shoulders and looked me up and down. “Kellan told us a crazy woman tried to attack you with a knife. He didn’t say anything about a little house with silver walls.”

  As Tristan and I gave Deirdre a sanitized version of yesterday’s events, Dennis and Ember came downstairs. They listened breathlessly, Deirdre and Ember with their hands over their mouths in shock the whole time. “That lady had a vision of your nightmare and attacked you?” Ember asked, her face white.

  Miserably, I nodded, and Dennis frowned.

  When we got to the part about Lady Elke barging through the shed’s door, Ember squeezed Lyric so tight that he hissed and bolted away, and Deirdre grabbed me again, crushing me to her chest.

  When we finished, Dennis rubbed his chin. “So the shed was the little house,” he concluded. “The tools on the wall were the silver.”

  “The tools were the silver?” Deirdre furrowed her brow. “Well, I’m just relieved it’s over. Now we need to get you to stop having that nightmare, Tessa. It’s a lot more serious than I thought.”

  I nodded. There was nothing I wanted more than to stop having my nightmare. Except for finding Jillian and Logan and bringing them back here, safe. And now that I no longer had to worry about Deirdre’s dream of little houses with silver walls, I was free to leave Lilybrook to get them.

  ❀

  That afternoon, I held tight to Tristan’s hand as I rang the doorbell to Aaron Jacobs’ house. In my other hand, I held a bouquet of balloons in all different colors, each of them printed with Get Well Soon.

  The healers who had flown out to Ringgold, Colorado to treat Aaron after his plunge off the cliff had worked fast, stealthily healing him enough to transport him back to Lilybrook within a few days. Now he was back home with his parents and a rotating crew of APR healers and physicians on hand to treat him.

  Mrs. Jacobs answered the door. When she saw me, a little wrinkle formed between her eyebrows. That was the only wrinkly thing about her. Her chin-length hair was polished and glossy, and her slacks and blouse were perfectly pressed. I resisted the urge to smooth my hair.

  “Mrs. Jacobs,” I said, gathering my courage. “We came to see Aaron. And to talk to you. Please.”

  She regarded us for a moment, then let us in. Everything in her house was immaculate. White and cream with straight lines and right angles. Not a speck of dust. It smelled like Lysol. My mother would love it here.

  “I heard about your little escapade to North Dakota,” Mrs. Jacobs said. “That was a very reckless thing to do, Tessa.”

  “Yes, ma’am,” I said. “I know. I’m sorry.”

  “I’m sure you’re grateful that John Kellan was able to rescue you.”

  Tristan stiffened beside me, and I squeezed his hand to calm him. This was not a good time for him to get hotheaded about Kellan. “Yes, ma’am. We’re very grateful.”

  But my humility wasn’t good enough for her, because she continued, her expression hard and immobile as granite. “The Carson family has brought a lot of trouble and heartache to this town.”

  At her words, the Nightmare Eyes appeared and burned down on me from above. “Yes, we have,” I said. “What I did was wrong. And my parents…there’s no excuse for what they did. But my brother and sister didn’t mean to hurt Aaron. It was self-defense.”

  The wrinkle between her brows deepened by a millimeter. “I am well aware of the situation. I saw the video. I read the reports. I talked to Aaron.”

  “Does that mean you’ll repeal Kellan’s shoot to-kill-order?” Tristan asked.

  She paused for a moment, then spoke directly to me. “Your parents killed two of our agents, Tessa. If those agents had been allowed to use deadly force at that time, they’d be alive today, and so would all of the innocent people your parents killed while your family was on the run for eight years.” Her face remained motionless, except for a tiny, defiant lift of her chin. “I stand by my decision. John Kellan is allowed to use deadly force if the situation calls for it.”

  She was motionless, but I was crumbling. “Mrs. Jacobs, Kellan will use deadly force whether the situation calls for it or not. He doesn’t care about them. All he cares about is vengeance.”

  Another miniscule movement: her eyebrow raised.

  I thought I’d convinced her, that my plea had softened her granite resolve, but her eyebrow lowered back into place and she said, “This discussion is over, Tessa.”

  Tristan put his arm around me. I knew it would be useless to appeal to her, he said silently. She said the same thing to my dad. We’ll just have to find another way.

  Mrs. Jacobs glanced up at the balloons we’d brought. “It’s almost time for Aaron’s meds. If you’d still like to see him, you have to do it now. Come with me.”

  My heart sinking, we followed her to Aaron’s bedroom, which was dominated by several computers, stacks of video games, and a large flat-screen TV. The overhead lights of his bedroom were turned off, but sunlight streamed through the slats in the blinds, revealing a swollen white figure on the bed. A cotton sheet covered him up to his chest, which was wrapped in bandages, as were both arms. His face was turned away, toward the window. Only his eyes and lips were left uncovered.

  He looks even worse than I thought he would, I flashed to Tristan. He’s just a pile of white bandages.

  He’s still a thousand times better than if he didn’t have psionic healers working on him.

  “You have two minutes,” Mrs. Jacobs said, then left.

  “Hi, Aaron.” The cheer in my voice was forced. “Welcome back.” I tied the balloons to the handle on his nightstand drawer. Aaron didn’t acknowledge me or the balloons. He didn’t move.

  Underneath all of Aaron’s bandages were lacerations and burns. The healers were able to heal his lacerations, but most of his burns were so bad that he would always be scarred.

  Above me, the Nightmare Eyes burned through my blood. But no matter how much I burned, it was nothing compared to the burns that Aaron was suffering. No matter how much I hated the scars my mother had carved into my belly, they were nothing compared to the burn scars Aaron would have on over forty percent of his body.

  My brother and sister had done this to him.

  But so had I.

  I had given him that final clue to Ringgold, Colorado. And I had encouraged his crush on Jillian, used it to motivate him to find her.

  A lump formed in my throat and I had to give up the cheerful act. “Aaron?” I choked. “Aaron, I am so, so sorry.”

  No reply. The only thing that moved were his eyelashes, down, then up.

  “Jillian and Logan, they didn’t know you were trying to help them,” I said. “If they knew, they never would have…” I couldn’t finish the sentence.

  No reply. Just another blink as he looked out the window.

  “When—if,” I corrected myself, because I was losing faith that there would be a when, “If I find Jillian, I’ll tell her how smart you are. How talented. I’ll bring her to meet you and—”

  Aaron flinched, then exhaled, muttering something. Five syllables.
/>   “What was that?” I asked.

  “You…” he inhaled. “Are…” he stopped, recovered, then dragged in another breath. “Killers’ …Spawn.”

  A vise clamped around my heart as Tristan went rigid. “Hey, man. That’s not fair.”

  “Aaron, please.” My heart shred into tiny pieces. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

  Slowly, Aaron turned his head to face me, and I was one hundred percent certain that when I looked at his eyes, they would be Nightmare black.

  But they weren’t. They were still brown.

  Aaron wasn’t feeding on my nightmare, on my shame and grief and despair.

  Aaron hated me on his own accord. And for some reason, that was even worse.

  ❀

  “Here’s a used car dealership in Warrenville,” I said, and called out its phone number to Tristan.

  Back in the Connellys’ guest room, I sat on the bed with Tristan’s laptop on my knees. Tristan dialed the number, then paced the room with his phone to his ear. Mac lay at my feet, thumping his tail occasionally, and Marmalade perched in her spot on top of the bookcase. The only good thing that happened today was finding out that the APR’s board of directors had put Nathan on probation for blocking Tristan’s premonitions, and he would be fired if he bothered me, or Tristan, ever again. But my blood still burned from Aaron’s rebuke as I clicked on another car dealership’s website.

  Before Lady Elke had fed upon my nightmare and gone crazy, she told us that Jillian and Logan were driving in a new car. “He doesn’t like this new car,” she’d said. “It’s too small. The RV had more space.”

  So, soon after their visit to Lady Elke, my siblings had gotten rid of their RV and purchased a different car. It was a tiny lead. We didn’t know what kind of car, or what color, or if they’d bought it at a dealership or through a private sale. But our appeal to Beverly Jacobs had failed, so that tiny lead was our only hope of finding Jillian and Logan before Kellan did. Now Tristan and I were contacting car dealerships in North Dakota one by one, asking if they recalled two teenagers buying a car with cash.